Life Lessons

Trevor fell victim this time! That’s not true. We are a team, so when the behavior is directed at him, it hits me and vice versa. I did feel bad for Trevor this time though. It was transition day. You all know this day. It’s the day the kids go from one house to the other. It is usually accompanied by bad behavior, temper tantrums, whining, and all around frustration. You must have sympathy for the kids though. In this case, they are going from spending the night at everyone’s house, sleeping on the floor, no bedtime, and more of a friend than a parent (I’m biased I recognize that, but you have no idea until you see it) to a house with their own bedrooms (that they actually sleep in), no chaos, and straight up stability.

Trevor was driving the kids to school and daycare. It seemed like any other day. Henry was playing with Lego’s in his booster seat and Carter wanted his music turned up. And then out of nowhere, like a Tornado, the hysteria broke loose. Henry started crying and Carter chimed in to ensure the attention was not taken from him. Trevor immediately stopped and said “What is going on? Why are you both crying and freaking out?!” Henry yells from the backseat, “Eric is dead and I miss him!” Eric is the kids’ mom’s friend. He died in 2006 and the kids never knew him. It has been brought up now because the kids mom went to his gravesite over the weekend, brought the kids, met some people there and then the three of them ended up spending the night at this person’s home. (If any of you find this logical in any way shape or form, look in the mirror and re-evaluate your life). I’m no expert, but I think meeting random people at a grave and then having my children spend the night at their house doesn’t exactly fall on the list of “This is what a parent should do”. But back to the crying. Trevor tries to calm them down, but there is no hope. An all-out bawl fest is happening in the backseat and there is no easing either of them. The kids’ mom is a Social Worker, so one would think that if you can help other children, yours should be a somewhat of a breeze, right? It doesn’t feel like that in our case though. I often go back to the line from The Wedding Planner, “Those who cannot wed, plan.” Well in this case “Those who cannot guide their own life, teach others how to guide their lives.”

Trevor politely explains to them that it’s sad what happened to Eric, but they never knew him so they can’t quite miss him or have crying fits about needing to see him. The chaos continues all the way to school. Trevor did notice that a valuable lesson could be taken from this sad event. Eric died because he was drinking, driving, and then lost control of the vehicle. Later that night, we took the time to explain to the kids that what happened to Eric was tragic, but it is something that can be prevented. We went into a lengthy discussion of what happens when you drink and drive. Carter was very interested and asked a lot of questions. It was a huge win on the father/step-mother front. We felt victorious! The kids stopped crying, evaluated the definition of “missing someone” and learned a valuable lesson about drinking and driving. As we put the kids to bed and sat down to watch an episode of Game of Thrones, we toasted a beer to the end of transition day. It was finally over and the next one was two weeks away. We were going to soak up every second of those two weeks.

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